an occasion for the ageless
This is your final opportunity to upgrade your membership in the International Society of Pre-Fossilized Dinosaurs (I.S.PF.D.). This Senior membership includes your Post Longevity Card and a permanent prescription for Ponds Extra Dee Skincare, which will keep your skin forever smooth, healthy, and subtle [sorry, disregard, that's a typo, it should read supple]. Ponds Lotion is renowned for preventing dry scaly skin, the first symptom of Saurism and the precursor to Fossilization. (read more)
Check your email now for the six-digit code and enter it into the spaces below, and we will immediately send you your free Post Longevity Card to benefit from, use, and enjoy indefinitely!
For best results: spread liberal quantities ofPond's Cream evenly over your entire body, at least twice a day, leaving a white protective sheen to cover the entire epidermis. Seniors still desiring genital intimacy should use care not to apply Ponds on genitalia as those organs may not function to desired performance. The proper use of Condoms has been shown to reduce side effects in such cases.
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